SRI SRI THAKUR ON MARRIAGE (1st Part)- Written by Kalyani patra

The three pillars of human being are ―Education‖, ―Initiation‖ and ―Marriage‖. These are the
three co-related parameter in life. Without either of these the life will be like fish without
water. Marriage is an extremely important part of this life because incompatible marriage will
not only spoil the individual‘s life but also ruin the Society as a whole.
Accordingly Sri Sri Thakur Says :
―Marriage fulfils two of a person's main desires:
one for evolution,
the other for good progeny;
a wrong marriage puts a blight on both;
have care
don't think marriage a game,
your life and your procreation
are wrapped up in it.‖
(Narir Niti, Verse no-72)
Bhgwat Gita concurs, "Putrarthe kriyate varjya‖(marriage is to continue the heredity).
Sri Sri Thakur says, ―To marry is a normal hankering in human beings. The very inner instinct
in man is to be rendered into multiple individuals. And from this instinctive hankering there
grows the tendency of unification between man and woman. This tendency of unification
between man and woman must be well adjusted in such a way that the appearance of super
efficient embodiment on this plane of matter comes to be most normal and natural.‖
(Ref Article by Dr. Rebati Mohan Biswas)
The binding of a man and woman socially, spiritually, biologically, psychologically and
temperamentally is called marriage. Now a day‘s lot of question arise like what is the
importance of compatible marriage on future generation for a family, society & country? What
is the importance of genetics? a good progeny?. The answer is simple; we have forgotten the
many important aspects about marriage. Hence Sri Sri Thakur re emphasised the topic and tried
to reform the society via marriage.
About marriage Sri Sri Thakur says
―Marriage is
not a matter of contact,
but it is solemnly needed
to draw one
in one‘s bosom of heart
with all service and
caressing attitude.‖
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Sri Sri Thakur explained further on the above message ―In marriage there should not be any
obligation rather inclination and that inclination obliges one. Love grows from this inclination.
Otherwise, marriage will be like a things obtained from the market‖
(Deeparakshi, 7/11/1956)
Actually, the root word of Marriage comes from ―marry‖ i,e ―Kanya‖(Bride) marries ―Bara‖(
Groom). ―Bara‖(Groom) means superior / bigger and ―Kanya‖(Bride) means smaller / younger.
So for a proper match in marriage, the groom should always be superior.
Sri Sri Thakur has emphasized on two kinds of marriage, viz:-
Hypergamous Marriage
Hypergamy means marriage in which the man's heredity (i.e. traits displayed in his family over
generations) is higher (i.e. of a higher level of serviceableness to existence) in relation
marriage in which the man's heredity is lower in relation to the wife's heredity.
Hypogamous Marriage
Hypogamy means marriage in which the man's heredity is lower in relation to the wife's
heredity.
According to Sri Sri Thakur :
―Just as hypergamy begets growth,
so hypogamy begets decay;
thus hypogamous marriage is a sin;
it demolishes one's own line,
and more,—
catching society and environment by the neck,
it drags them also toward destruction‖.
(Narir Niti, M. No-80)
From the above message it is clear that we should follow Marriage on the principles of
―Varna‖( groupings of similar instincts) system. i,e. marriage of a man should be in his own
―varna‖. So marriage can achieve the twin objectives e.g., superior becoming and procreation
of good children.
Hypergamous marriage effects a blood-compactness among different Varna‘s and binds them
together in a deep mutual relationship. So a common Ideal and hypergamous marriage are
indications of social integration.
If the marriage is Hypogamous (Pratiloma), then Progeny of such marriages are distorted by
birth. as Sri Sri Thakur said "inferior sperm destroys the nodules of a superior ovum". These
people, however brilliant, are anti-existence, anti-life by birth, and cannot be cured.
Hence, Sri Sri Thakur says the best ground for marriage is:
―In that varna and cultural heredity
where your feelings, education, character
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and behavior
are nourished and purified
lies your best ground for marriage.
Remember‹
result will come
according to the place and the way
in which love is lodged.
There is no doubt about it;
so move wisely.‖
(Narir Niti,M.No-74)

Kalyani patra, Malaysia